Me...

I have recently asked my self. Who am I? I'd like to say a well rounded, peaceful, happy wife and mom. I look that way on the outside. But inside? Inside is no place I would wish on anyone too see. But that's another story I don't care to go into right now. The basic is, I am stuck in a very dark world. One that scares me, wakes me up in the middle of the night trying to catch my breath. One that has caused harm not only to me, but to ones I love. I have apologized for my sin, truly repented to God. I have asked Him to forgive me. I know deep down he has, but I know that's not all he wants from me. I need to speak out loud of my sins. I will not be going into details, but I have hurt people. Loved ones. I have a problem.


With that aside, who am I? Well I am me. Cathy. I am 28, can't believe I just put that out there lol, but I did. I am married, have 2 very handsome boys, and a beautiful step daughter (I call her my "acquired" daughter). Anyways, I am a stay at home mom. This is because our boys have some very "special" needs. I choose to give my life to them to help them better succeed in life. Both boys have sensory issues, speech delays, and developmental delays. Recently our youngest was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. He has speech therapy (ST), occupational therapy (OT), and play therapy. Both boys will be having developmental evaluations as they both may possibly be on the spectrum. My oldest boy has had a rough start from the get go. He was diagnosed with Torticollis as an infant (this is where the muscle in the neck becomes so tight it pulls the head down to the shoulder and turns it out at a very odd angle, his tilt was to the right with his head turned out to the left). He was 4 weeks old and by 6 weeks was in very intensive physical therapy (PT) until he was 10 1/2 months old. Since then he has been in and of PT for gross motor delays because of hypotonia. Both boys also have fine motor delays which is being treated by OT. I love both boys, and wouldn't change them for the worlds, but its because of this I HAVE to stay home with them. Its expensive enough for childcare, nonetheless kids who need multiple forms of therapy. Plus the fact I want to be the ones raising them, they are my kids, lol.

So, who am I? I am a mom. Thanks for reading.